This week we go back in time and revisit Corrine’s experience going through a divorce in her early 20s. We talk about how her life intersected with Neil’s, what it was like for both of them during that time, and what helped Corrine survive. She shares tips on what her friends did to support her, some of the lessons she learned in retrospect, and what she would tell herself if she could give her younger self advice before going through all of this.
“Content With the Things Allotted Unto Us” Talk by Neal A. Maxwell https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2000/04/content-with-the-things-allotted-unto-us?lang=eng
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Okay. You had the idea for today's podcast. So do you want to introduce it? Sure. Um, I think. We've shared so many different stories and a lot of them end up being the same, which is good. There come from great experiences, but I think one, I was trying to think of a story or time of life or something about us or you that would be unique or super helpful for people in general.
And I thought of the time after about the time we met when Um, you were coming off of a divorce and then, you know, we started dating. And during that time, I look at kind of where you were in your life and, you know, it's just kind of crazy because fast forward, could I show, you know, had we both seen. What life looks like now and how different things are and all the great things that have happened.
Um, and for me and probably for you look at who you were then versus who you are now. And if you could compare the pictures and if I could have shown you back then, it would just be like mind blowing. Um, super interesting. I just thought that'd be something cool to talk about. Well, I think we have to set up a little bit of.
what happened before in order for this to make sense. So, and I've talked about my mistake and not listening to the spirit when, you know, the spirit tried to prompt me before I, before I got married the first time. Um, but I got married right out of college and it was kind of like all of my friends were getting married and I felt this kind of like sense of FOMO or something like, Oh my gosh, we're all leaving, like everyone's scattering.
And, and if I don't get married now, I might end up like one of those girls that never gets married. And so when there was an opportunity, I mean, I remember like trying to talk myself into this is going to be a more stable relationship because I'd, I'd had a really, Toxic, unhealthy relationship, my junior year of college, dating, right, right, dating relationship.
So then my senior year. Um, I met who ended up being my ex husband, but when I met him, I was like, this is going to be better. This is going to be stable. And he had like all the things on the list that I had written out of like what I wanted in a husband. And. So on paper, literally it looked really good.
It looks like, okay, this is all going to work out great. This is going to be perfect. But the, the key thing that I always try to tell people when I explain kind of the backstory is that right before we got married, I had two really profound experiences where the spirit said. Don't marry him like don't go through with this and I didn't listen because I was so afraid of Losing out on the opportunity to get married.
I was it was all fear based I was afraid of upsetting people who had spent a lot of money and Planned everything and people were flying in from all over for this wedding. We had like people like his relatives that were coming from like Alaska. I mean, and my parents had spent a ton of money. And so I was just, I had all these worldly concerns about like, I can't call this off like this.
It was like 10 days before. And I was like, I can't call it off like this last minute. Um, and then the second prompting that I got was literally the day of, and still I was just, paralyzed in fear of like, well, I better just do this. And that's probably just cold feet. I totally second guessed myself, like as if I couldn't actually hear the spirit talking to me.
And so then, you know, things became pretty quickly went from bad to progressively worse throughout that course of one year. And Um, so we ended up separating at almost exactly a year mark. And when I talk to people about going through a divorce and what that was like, you know, with my first husband, my first marriage, these are the two most important things.
Number one, talking about like always listen to the spirit as far as like if I, I could have avoided that if I had been courageous enough to do what the spirit told me to do. So that's number one. But number two, when I decided, okay, this is, there's. This is the end point. It was because I received a very strong spiritual prompting and because I acted on that, and that was my deciding factor, like talking to God and getting an answer from him and then acting on that.
I've never had to question myself. I've never looked back and gone like, did I do the right thing? Or maybe I shouldn't have, or should I have tried harder or whatever? Um, there was actually one other very, very, uh, Very tender mercy sweet experience that I had where I met with a bishop and a stake president on the same day And they both said the exact words to me verbatim.
Um, and I know there's no way that they planned this, but after I met with my bishop, he said, I, as your bishop, I can't counsel you to leave your husband. But if you were my daughter, I would tell you to leave. And then a few hours later, or sorry, it was the other way around my first, I met with my stake president.
Who's now, um, A general authority and I just adore and love him so much. His name is Weatherford Clayton. He was like a very beloved OBGYN in this area for years too. A lot of women like had him as their stake president and their OB at the same time. But, um, anyway, he said that to me first, that like, I, as your stake president, I cannot counsel you to leave your husband, but if you were my daughter, I would tell you to leave.
And then a few hours later, I met with my Bishop and he said the same words. And I knew there was no way they like planned that it was the spirit confirming to me like you're doing the right thing. So, and I think that sometimes those, those kind of like tender mercy things can come in. Um, but looking back, you know, I had.
close friends, even family members, people who I really respect and admire and look up to say kind of judgmental things to me or question me or give me a hard time about that. And I've never questioned myself because I knew that I made that decision with God and that that's what the spirit told me. So I've never had to look back and second guess myself.
So those are some very, very important lessons of listening to the spirit, um, that I learned and That first marriage that I, I try to, you know, when the opportunity feels right, when it arises, I try to teach that to, you know, people who are trying to figure out who to marry or what to do, or even if they're in like a really sticky situation.
Like I have women that reach out to me on Instagram that are like, you know, I'm in a really bad marriage. I'm in a really bad situation. My husband isn't like your husband. He doesn't want to work on his recovery or whatever. And the answer is the same every time. Like, go to the Spirit, go to, go to, take this to God and the Spirit will tell you.
exactly what to do. And if you do that, you'll never have regrets. Like you'll know that you did the right thing if you partner with God and, and you listen. Yeah. No, that's super helpful. I think just to walk through that process, like I think, and this is right after kind of all that happened. This is when I met you, and it's so crazy to think back of that time and how you were during that time, but I think that you navigated it really well and obviously got into like a, you know, Well, I think we should tell that story too.
of kind of when we met and where I was at and all that. Um, so we met in Lake Powell. Yeah. And I was actually going through my divorce. I was kind of like at the tail end. And so after we met in Lake Powell and we were with all these friends, had a great time, and met all of your friends, and then my friends were hanging out with your friends after, and And I remember calling my stake president who also is a general authority now, Brian Taylor.
But I called him and I said, Hey, I want to meet with you. And I, I went to his office and sat down and met with them. And I said, I met this guy and I really like him and I want to date him. What do you think? And at first he said, yeah, I think that's reasonable. Like you've been legally separated for about a year.
Um, and he gave me permission to date you. So we went on a couple Brian Taylor. We went on a couple of dates and then he called me. And said, you know what Corinne, I've actually been thinking about this and I would like for you to wait. So that came to a screeching halt and I was like, Oh, wow. So I still remember calling you and you were at the gym.
I remember this phone call like super well. Yeah. And I called you and said, this is so weird, but my stake president called me and said that he'd actually like for me to wait until this is all final before we're dating. And I remember what you said. You were like, you know what, these things have a way of working out and if it's meant to be, it'll be.
And, you know, whenever that time is. There will be an opportunity for us to date if we're supposed to and you were like Totally crystal clear in your faith. Like there was no like, oh man, like, okay But I mean it was just like easy for you to accept that Yeah, well, I think it, I think I felt it and I believed in the process, like I believe in, you know, church leadership, that it's inspired and, and there is a kind of a sequence and a, a way that things are, are done.
And I believe in the source of that. Um, but I overall, I think it just was a feeling of like, Hey man, it's going to be fine. It was just very confident. Yeah, comforting. I felt peaceful too. Spiritual peace, like really peaceful. I, I would say that would, would be the word that describes it, which is like, that's what, how we describe the Holy Spirit or I mean, other people might say the universe or faith or whatever your, you know, faith background is.
Yeah. Just that inner feeling of peace and that's what really led me to be like, yeah, this is going to be just fine. Yeah. Well, and then, you know, we both kind of went about our lives and I remember it was, you know, probably two or three weeks later, I kind of just reached this breaking point. My attorney would call me and I would just like have this like sick feeling every time I saw his number because I knew it would be like an update on whatever was going on with my legal situation.
And so he called me. I remember it was like during a piano lesson because I, I used to teach piano and, and so I, you know, I called him back after the piano lessons were over. Um, and there was some update that was just like a gut punch. And I just remember it was so clear that it was like, this has got to, you, you need to wrap this up and move on with your life like a year.
And there were just, there was no reason for us to keep going. And so it took me kind of giving in on some things and just letting it go, which is so applicable to life, right? There's just situations where. You'll just hang on to it and hang on to it and you want to be right or you want things to go your way until you finally just accept it for what it is and let it go.
And I, I wonder looking back now, I've literally never thought of this before today, but I wonder if Brian Taylor's, you know, his impression to call me and say, actually, I'd like for you to wait till this is final. I wonder if that had been diff, if, Everything would have gone differently if he hadn't said that and we were just allowed to date.
I don't know that there would have been that strong of a pull for me to be like, I gotta move on with my life. You know, if we were dating anyway, and then like things were kind of just, maybe that would have just drug out for who knows how long. You know, but, um, it was just, It was like I knew it was time.
So I decided like, okay, let's just, you know, I'm going to let some of these things go that I've been holding really tight onto that I wanted them to go my way. We signed divorce papers and it was done. And then, you know, we were able to start dating, but going back to the very first thing that you talked about in the beginning, like, would you have ever seen yourself?
Now, you know, would you have pictured this for yourself and I remember just feeling like such a shell of a person I had been through so much and Felt a lot of despair and a lot of like man Like I did all the things and I I wasn't perfect but I really tried to be prepared to you know got married in the temple and Wanted to be a mom wanted to have kids and then right about the time that I got divorced All of my friends were having their first or second babies, all of them, you know, a lot of them had been married a little bit earlier than me.
So like a year or two out of college, they were having babies and then I was going through a divorce and, um, this, this quotation from the talk content with the things allotted unto us is so good. And I didn't have this at the time, but looking back now, it makes so much sense. And I think that, you know, that trial for me was a phase.
It was a period of time that I had to get through. And then there are other trials that we carry that are with us. for the extent of our lives. And he explains that really well. Um, Neil A. Maxwell in this talk that I pulled up this week, as I was studying my scriptures, because the topic, the line comes from scripture content with things allotted unto us.
Neil A. Maxwell adapted that from scripture and then wrote a whole talk on it. So he says, Being content means acceptance without self pity. Meekly born, however, deprivation such as these can end up being like excavations that make room for greatly enlarged souls. So even just looking at that, I feel like I'm a different person.
Because I went through that, I feel like I go into church and I see people differently. Like, I see single women differently than I would have had I never gone through that. I see people who feel like a social misfit when they don't fit into that, like, cookie cutter mold of husband, wife, children, happy marriage, happy life.
I see that much better than I would have seen it had I not gone through what I did. Um, so that excavation for sure happened for me. And then the next part, he says, some undergo searing developments that cut suddenly into mortality status quo. Some have trials to pass through. While still others have allotments, they are to live with Paul lived with his thorn in the flesh.
That's from Corinthians. But, um, I've talked with my therapist about this before, about how there are things in life that I have kind of accepted are always going to be part of life for me or for you or for us. And those are like thorn in the flesh type of trials where it's like in this life, it's probably not going to get resolved.
And then there are excavation trials where it's like. the Lord excavated with me and that whole, you know, felt so deep and hollow. And then it was filled up with things like love and compassion and seeing others and being more empathetic and, and all of the good things that we want to become in this life.
Yeah, and I, I was just thinking as you were talking about all of this, one of the things immediately that attracted me to you, first off, I thought you were like 19. I was like, when we first started talking, you just looked youthful. And I'm just due to, you know, the nature of the trip. But I think, Immediately, I think some of these things came up that you had been married and then that there was a, you just were super confident about who you were, what was important and what you wanted.
And I think that immediately I was like, wow, okay, this, this person has some depth, has some wisdom, has some faith. Like I saw so many different traits that. I had been looking for and, and searching for like in the dating process, which I, I found in, in, you know, various forms with various people, but I think it, It just really hit hard when we met and that was something that for me completely changed how I saw you and, and kind of what, for me, that was like, this is, this is someone who's like marriage material, you know, that really strongly, um, and it helped that you're insanely attractive too.
But anyway, but, but you know what I mean? So like those things I picked up on it and that was really, it drew me to you. Well, I remember also when we met being so crystal clear, like you're saying confident, but I felt like it was just clarity on what I really wanted to. And I remember, you know, after going through that horrific, you know, course of events that led me to be this, like, you know, almost divorced and that was also just a side note for that.
That's such an awkward time of life. If you end up going through a divorce and you are. Um, you know, you're not single certainly yet, but you're also not married in the sense of like, we share a home together. We share a bank account together. We're doing life together. It's not like that. Like being separated or legally separated was such a weird part of life, but it also gave me a lot of solitude, a lot of alone time, a lot of pondering time, a lot of time to get super clear on, okay, if I do this again.
What do I need it to look like next time? So the thing that I got ultra clear on was I need to find someone who is not ashamed of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Like that was my number one. It was, I wanted someone who was solid in their testimony. They weren't too cool to talk about it. Um, that was something that like, I didn't want there to be any room for like, Oh, well, actually this is, I kind of have some doubts about this or problems with that or, um, and I love and respect my friends who that's part of their marriage.
Everyone has their heart. And for us, a lot of that has been addiction recovery. Um, so maybe that is You know, part of your dynamic where like one spouse has some face struggles or whatever. For me, going through what I went through, I knew that I wanted, that, that was just what I was clear on. I wanted someone who would be my partner in.
Being a believer in the gospel of Jesus Christ and knowing that that was going to be a constant and that we could always come back to that and be on the same page, even if we really differed in our opinions or our desires or what we wanted out of life, we could always come back to that same page. And so when I met you, our first real conversation, I mean, our kids love to hear this, but the first words you said to me was good morning, sunshine, because I slept on the floor.
Literally like the, the bare, you know, linoleum floor in that houseboat and you were sleeping on like an air mattress. So you look over and everything was dark the night before. So I, like we got there, people had already gone to bed. So like, I, we didn't even see each other until the next day. And this is a houseboat of 55 people, but you said that to me and it was the first person that talked to me that day.
And I think I just like gave you a crusty and rolled over. Um, and looks the other direction, but the first time we had an actual conversation. Yeah, the, the literal first conversation that you and I had in Lake Powell in swimsuits. And it's funny that we actually have a picture of it because one of our friends took a picture.
Um, we taught, we ended up through the course of that. conversation somehow ending on our testimonies and talking about the gospel, talking about how much we loved church. We loved Jesus. We loved all of these things. And it wasn't like you were too cool or you wanted to impress me by like being kind of nonchalant.
There's unfortunately, At least I remember when I was dating a lot of people who were like, yeah, you know, like I'm not too nerdy, but like, yeah, I go to church, but like, I don't want to talk too much about it because it's not cool. And you were the opposite. And that was what attracted me the most to you.
Yeah. And I, looking back to like, that was likewise for me. That's something that I knew at the core that was most important for me was like, I've got to have someone who really has this dialed at the center and at the core and is really strong and solid in their faith and belief. Um, because I, I felt like I'm like, okay, if we can be aligned on that, there might be other things that you're, you disagree on or you struggle with or whatever.
But if, if we're about the same process of trying to live the gospel, like we'll, we'll be able to get. Get through it and work through different things. Yeah. Well, to, so to go back to the topic of divorce, I feel like a lot of people ask me, you know, how do I have a friend going through this? How do I support them?
Or, or I'm finding myself in this situation, like give me some of your advice of what you learned or what you did, what helped. So there's a few things. I think that. Number one, I had a friend, Tracy, who called me, and I just will forever be so grateful for her. She saw that I was going through this and she called me and said, there's a few things that I wish I would have known.
And if you're okay with that, I'd love to tell you. I was like, yes, please. So her very first thing, and there was no Instagram at the time. It was only Facebook. But everybody was very active on Facebook at the time. Like we had, we were just a couple years, Out of college. So this was like still you had to have been like adopted into Facebook with a dot edu email address So only people it was kind of cool because it was like only younger people like our parents and grandparents weren't on Facebook yet and You know, that's where everybody was posting their updates and their pictures and their statuses and what, like, I love the meme too.
That's like I, there's no one I relate to less than my status updates of 2008. It's really so true. But anyway, at the time, that's where everybody lived. That was the only social media that I remember being active on. And she was like, you need to go through and unfriend all of your mutual friends. But anyone that you feel like is a better friend with him than they are with you.
You got to unfriend them because you just don't need all the updates. And I was like, that might seem mean, like, I don't want to do that. I was really worried about offending people or hurting their feelings. She was like, Nope, for your own mental health and sanity, you got to do it. So I listened to her and I went through and unfriended and blocked some people.
Um, It was one of the best things I ever did because I really to this day still I have no idea I don't and and I am very I am very fortunate that I was in a situation where we didn't have kids So there was no reason for us to really stay connected at all It's obviously really different if you've built a life together for many many years and you have Kids together or you have, you know, it might be harder if you have mutual friends that both of you have been friends with for forever.
But I still look back and think, yeah, those people that were mutual friends at the time. I specifically remember this one girl who I just loved when I was newly wed and we were living in Orange County and she was like a BYU friend that then was like an Orange County friend. But yeah, that's it. Her husband and my ex-husband were very tight.
So I knew that if I stayed like Facebook friends with her, I would still see it was, there was a good likelihood I was gonna still see like updates or whatever, or crossover. And I remember that was the hardest unfriend. Um, that, and like his, some of his family members that I was like, I'm not like mad at them.
I just, I just can't be connected. Um, but that girl that I remember, it was one of the hardest. Buttons to click like unfriend she ended up like. Um, sending me a friend request, I don't know, like five, six years later and our friends again and it's fine. So it might just be for a season two. Some of those people, it was just a season where I was like, I got to disconnect for a minute.
And now all these social media platforms have a mute button, which is amazing because then you can just mute, um, you don't have to necessarily unfriend. Although I, I do think that it's healthy in some ways to just cut ties and move on in a different direction. But the mute button is genius because then you can just.
Still remain friends, but you don't have to see or hear updates, you know, and, and then start moving on with your own life. Another thing that I think was really, really important was, and I didn't even know boundaries. I didn't even know what that was really at the time, but I remember going to lunch with two of my girlfriends who I still just deeply love and adore and, and.
I'm good friends with now, but we went to, to lunch and I still remember we were at Cetabello sitting at one of those tall tables and the two of them were both pregnant with their first babies and they talked baby and pregnancy the whole time. And I had nothing to contribute and they weren't doing it to be cruel.
It's just like their phase of life. And after that I was like, I got to find some new people to hang out with because this is just kind of like make me feel. So sad and so finding a group of friends. Actually, this was a godsend. This was totally Divine intervention like a lifesaver that friend that I told you called me Tracy, she set up this thing called the First Wives Club and she, once a week we would get out and go do something.
And it was all women who either had been divorced or were currently going through a divorce. And so I met these new friends who understood what I was going through and their version of like, all I can think about is baby talk was, Oh my gosh, my attorney called and said this or my ex mother in law did that and now it's awkward.
And how do I deal with that? And they were people who were in this. Same phase of life as me, and it was so helpful to have that support. I would imagine the same way that it's helpful for you to have people in your support system and recovery that understand, like they just get it right. Yeah, no, that's, that's the B that's kind of one of the foundational concepts of a support group is someone that.
Yeah. Like you can say one thing or share experience or share what's going on and immediately there's no need for explanation or like a hundred percent I get it and they not just get it logically but they feel it too and that's what a lot of times we need. We just need to be heard and seen and like, uh, receive validation of like, yeah, you're not crazy.
This is hard. And also if you can be mentored by someone like my friend Tracy, who was like, I know this is hard. Yeah. But do this and it will help you, you know, someone who's been through it, like that's kind of how. Sponsor in addiction recovery. So it's almost like, yeah, you had like a little recovery group for.
And like a sponsor. Yeah, the sponsor. Who I could call and be like, this just happened. And she's like, okay, here's what we do now. You know, she'd been there. So she knew that was super, super helpful for me. And, uh, I try to. you know, give back where I can and offer that support to other women who find themselves in the same situation because I, I don't know what I would have done without Tracy.
Like she really was such a lifesaver for me. Another thing that I think was ultra helpful. I kind of reached a breaking point where I was so tired of being sad and mad and having just negative emotions, like going to bed, thinking about it, waking up, thinking about it. It was just like, so consuming. And it is if you go through a divorce.
And so I looked for something, I started to look for something that would just, you know, make me feel better. Allow me to serve and think about someone else. And so I ended up, I, I looked into lots of different opportunities and the one I felt most drawn to was Make A Wish and Utah is really cool because they have, they're one of the few Make A Wish organizations in the U.
S. that has like an entire building dedicated to it. They have this whole beautiful process that they go through with wish kids that come in And they have, you know, some kind of a, life threatening condition. It doesn't mean that that that's a misconception of make a wish that like, if you're a make a wish kid, then you're for sure dying.
It's kids who have some kind of a life threatening situation where that's a possibility with what they're dealing with. And so, I got trained, I had to do lots of hours of training, but I got trained as a, uh, wish grantor at Make A Wish and then I would be assigned a wish kid and we would take them through the full process, start to finish of, you know, meeting the kids, receiving them, um, at the Make A Wish Foundation Center and then taking them through the whole process of they would play a game and they would do different things to kind of get down to the core of what they wanted to wish for.
And then we would do a wish reveal once we got like, um, Approval for their wish and I really tried to make those extra special like Um, I almost tried to make it like a, uh, like a mini wish where I would find like, you know, a little celebrity or a really cool situation where there was one girl who loved volleyball and wanted to go to the Olympics so bad.
There was like a summer Olympics coming up. So I had her come to a BYU volleyball game and had the BYU women's volleyball team tell her she was getting her wish. And then like another girl who loved country music, I ended up, um, I had a connection to Blake Shelton. And then so his manager. Um, and I think the thing that really set this all up for me that she got a private meet and greet before one of his concerts in Utah and he told her she was getting her wish.
And then, um, and that was really special for her and her family. So those were things that brought me immense joy, like so much joy that it was a break from all of the heartache, the heaviness. And, and that was another thing that I feel like if you have room for that in your life, that will really help you get through.
This hard time or make room for it, you know, make room for like, I'm going to treat this like it's, you know, a court ordered or a job or something that I would never skip, like pick something else in your life that you never skip and make it that and that like, Constant, active service is going to help you to not just think about your own situation, but to help and serve others in a way that feels good to you.
Yeah. And I've heard this, that's a concept I've heard in, obviously in recovery, they talk about service is like one of the main pillars, step 12 is service, right? But also just the, And like the secular world, different motivational speakers, they all, almost all of them talk about a service component or some giving component.
Um, I think of who we've had Casey Baugh on the podcast, his whole mantra, the secret to living is giving, and he's, you know, someone who, you know, Is constantly micro giving, you know, money to, to people who are delivering, you know, um, Uber, DoorDash or different situations. I mean, really, really cool. That's such a powerful tool.
Well, I want to read one more thing from this. Maxwell taught content with the things allotted unto us. He says, Developing greater contentment with certain of our existing constraints and opportunities is one of our challenges. Otherwise, we may feel underused, underwhelmed, and underappreciated, while ironically, within our givens are unused opportunities for service.
All about us. Neither should we pieing away, therefore, for certain things outside God's givens, such as for the powerful voice of an angel, because there is so much to do with what has been allotted to us, and that's the core of this talk. But I think about that and I think about like. There was a temptation to feel like why me or like I've just kind of, you know, reduced myself to this like single person you brought up when we were planning this podcast episode that I had a job that was pretty boring and Didn't demand a lot of me and I felt kind of like this says like unused under You know, underutilized, not really needed, underappreciated.
And then I faced, you know, some of that like judgment from others and just felt like a such a low version of myself. And doing the service for sure was one of the things that helped kind of pull me out of that a little bit. But I also look back and, and that like quote unquote boring job, oh my gosh, it was such a gift and a blessing to me to not have a stressful job during that time, to not feel like.
I had to juggle the stress of a divorce and the stress of like a really demanding job at the same time. And I'll never forget when I went to my boss who was just such a good man, like such a kind, good, like man of God that I went to him and I quit a year or so into that job because I had found that job at Vivint that I was so excited for.
And that was a much more demanding job. It was going to pay better. The hours were better. Um, the benefits were going to be better, like it was kind of like better all around and I was ready for that at that time, but I still remember feeling really bad when I went to go tell my boss, like, Hey, I'm really sorry, but I'm, you know, it's time for me to quit.
I found something that's a better opportunity. And I still remember him looking at me and was so much kindness and love. He said, you know, we knew you weren't going to stay long. Um, I just really felt like. We were supposed to give you a safe, this was supposed to be a safe place for you to work while you went through your divorce.
And I felt so much love from him at that time and so much gratitude, even though I had kind of felt like, well, I don't really do a whole lot here. I'm not really needed. This is pretty boring. I look back with so much gratitude that he, A, was like very spiritually in tune and listened to the spirit. I mean, and we try to do that when we hire people, we try to fully go by the spirit.
So looking back, it doesn't surprise me that he would have that feeling, but also just that that was something that God gave me as a gift. Like a, a really easy job and an opportunity to get through a hard time and then be ready for something bigger. And I think a lot of times we don't see that. We don't see how there's a lot of grace and love given to us in the situations that we have.
Yeah, that's such an interesting concept because so much of the time, I feel like there's so much conversation that happens between people and thinking with myself or ourselves of like, I'm trying to do this, or I want this to happen. I want this job. I want this situation. I want to be, I want to be married.
I want to have kids. I remember feeling that being single and just being like, man, I'm just, when's it going to happen for me? And I, nothing's working out and being so frustrated. Looking back during that time, it was like a really great repertory time and opportunity and there were great things that were happening and, and I, and I believe that.
I believe that if I'm, I, I think if we're trying to follow God and listen, will be where, where we're supposed to be, and it'll be the right place. And we might not fully recognize it or see it, but God sees it. And he knows the ending from the beginning. And so what I thought was so cool, and this is kind of how we started the episode.
Was look, thinking back to that, you during that time when you're working that job. I remember that so clearly. And I talked to you on the phone and you're like, yeah, I'm just kind of hanging out, but I, you know, I'm trying to be busy, but I don't know. Um, versus now we're talking on podcasts that. Um, you know, essentially you felt inspired to create and, you know, or you're have this, this Instagram and influencing others in, you know, to, to do good things, to be good people, um, and to provide service to others in various ways.
Um, I think of the impact, all of these different things that have happened, you know, if you fast forward and you look at that now versus where you were at then at that low point and Um, you know, it's a powerful, powerful and really, really cool. Um, and, and it's just interesting to even think back to that time and be like, wow, I can't, I can't believe that that was, you know, at that point you had no idea and I had no idea.
Um, but we just, you know, tried to do what we felt the spirit and God wanted us to do and follow through the process.
Yeah, well, I think also to go back to Maxwell when he talks about like not pining for something else when there's so much work to be done with what you've been allotted. I've definitely been guilty of that, like pining for something else, wishing for something else. But. A lot of times in hindsight, you're like, wow, this was exactly what I needed.
It was, you know, maybe an excavation of creating, you know, a big crater for your heart to fill up with things that it didn't have before that experience before that, like really shaping and molding experience. But also in the meantime, in our trials, whether it's an excavation trial or a thorn trial, you know, like Paul's thorn where you just have to live with it.
Um, for the rest of this life, um, there's always so much work to be done, you know, in our situations. And so I, I think that it was hard for me to visualize the future, to picture what I, I almost was afraid to like hope or wish for things differently because I felt like that kind of a hope got me where I was.
Like that, that like, I just really want perfect life and trying to follow like the paper formula got me where it got me, um, but learning to follow the spirit, you know, there was a way better plan that God had for me. Um, which involved you and our kids and what we do for work now, which is so cool. Um, being able to share messages like, I mean, that's something you and I were so passionate about both of us, like living and sharing the gospel that now we get to do that for a job, you know, for part of our job is so incredible.
Um, but I think in those times, in those low points where you kind of feel like you've been, you know, broken down to a shell of a person and you're kind of like, you know, Um, what is, what am I even good for? You know, that's what I remember feeling. And I think if there's one thing I could tell myself, I would go back and say during that like really low point, I actually don't even think it would be like, Hey, look at how great life's going to be.
I think it would be more along the lines of, I know you think you want something else, but right now. There are opportunities and, and that's the point of this, like content with the things allotted unto us. Like, look at all the good that you can do right now. And just seeing that, seeing, I, I think that's like an eternal life lesson that we're trying to get better at is just whatever situ situation you're in, seeing the beautiful potential that God has given you to make a big difference with what has already There's, there's so much work to be done.
Thanks so much for listening to Mint Aero Messages. We're so grateful that you spent time with us today. Make sure you go follow us at Corinne Stokoe or at Mint Aero Messages on Instagram. And then if you have a second and you love the show, I would love it so much if you'd leave a rating or a review on Apple Podcasts.
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